I do not understand the attraction humans have for presents related to working. Mum wanted a new drill to help her start installing more plumbing fixtures. You cannot eat a present like that! At least I got a nice dog chew for one of my gifts. I was less happy with my Santa outfit though: have a look at the picture and see what you think.

What is a dog supposed to do when he can smell yummy chocolate and the humans have left it right at the bottom of the audio racks within my reach? Well the answer is obvious – I clawed the bag open and I had just ripped the box open, ready to eat some lovely Rum Truffles, when Nan came to find out what all the noise was for. How was I supposed to know the chocolates were a present for Dad’s Mum? I am really in the doghouse and Mum has taken a photo of the evidence. Bad dog!

The best present we have bought this year has to be the Mizuno golf for Dad’s son. He is crazy about the game, which is fine but I have found that most golf courses do not welcome dogs to visit. I prefer a nice walk on the Downs, where doggies can wander wherever they want to.

I quite enjoy travelling in the car as long as I have a nice blanket to snuggle into. I get quite fed up when people keep calling Mum on her phone cos it is hard for her to give attention to the call as well as driving and looking after a dog! She thinks that a Bluetooth headset looks a bit over the top, so normally we do not take calls en route.

I am getting ready for the big day, wrapping presents and writing cards. I got a great musical card for my Dad, and when it is opened there is the lovely sound of dogs barking. I am sure he will like it when he is training on his new elliptical equipment.

Do you ever want to see life as it should be? Well this is your chance – the nice people at Coke zero, the drink for humans with real taste and zero sugar, offer you the chance to direct your own mini movie online. Have a look at the old film excerpts on the website and change the lines to the things you think they should have really said. Then your famous movie will be there for everyone to see and vote on.